Saturday, November 1, 2008

Why Not Have Some Fun Right After Your Divorce?

By Carol Cavanaugh

What's life without second chances, after all to err is human. So you have just undergone a nasty divorce after a tiresome and incomplete marriage. Now its time to move on with your life, no one can be alone forever. You have shed tears and now its time to smile again. The best way to jumpstart a new life is to start dating again. Dating instills confidence and of course brings a cheerful spirit.

Perhaps you've even considered dating already, but you have hesitations because it's been so long. Or maybe you're not entirely sure you're ready for it, or lack the confidence necessary for the journey. Everybody in this situation feels these emotions so don't worry. Just remember that you have the right to be happy again, and fear shouldn't hold you back.

The first step is the most fun. Get a new set of clothes, put on your favorite fragrance, and go out with a group of your friends. In order to find a date, you must utilize a social network. During the even, go up to several people and introduce yourself. Without being too forward, start a casual conversation. Don't be phased by rejections, and keep in mind that a rejection probably has nothing to do with you. If you make up your mind that you want to have fun during the evening, that's exactly what you'll get.

Don't have too many reservations about whom you want to date, after all you are not looking for a spouse already. You are single and can afford to do some wild things which you have always secretly wanted, so look at the whole situation as a golden opportunity.

Once you have found your date, approach the situation like a 22 year old would, irrespective of your age. Be excited yet more mature than a 16 year old. Easy conversations on neutral topics are the safest. Forget about your ex, he made you miserable when you were with him, now don't do it to yourself even when he is not there. Please don't cry and tell your sob stories to your date, we planned to have fun remember.

Now that all is going very well and you feel young, sexy and happy after a long hard time. Your date may not be the perfect one for you. Still you can have some fun time with this person. Don't worry where the relationship is going and whether it will end up in disaster. Anyway all relationships after honeymoon is going to change. That is the rule of life. So do not have any negative thoughts or pre-notions which will adversely affect a growing relationship. Always keep a positive outlook to what is going on but don't just close your eyes towards reality.

If your first date did not go so well, that's ok, it means you have many more to come. How would you know which ice-cream flavor you like the best unless you have tasted a couple? So its all about meeting, greeting and if its good then keeping if not fleeting! So take it a day at a time. It's a new life, learn from the mistakes in the past and look with a positive perspective in future.

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